Wednesday, August 06, 2008. 7:10 PM
I usually don’t give my journal/blog/random thoughts a title, but I decided to name this one: “Obama and my Momma.” The story begins about two months ago. I asked my mother, “Did you ever think you would live to see this day?” Her response, “Not in my lifetime.” For those of you who don’t know, my parents are from the South. I’m talking, "WADE IN THE WATER SOUTH," and it’s common knowledge in my family that we are descendents of slaves who worked in the field. Anyway, she tells me she wants an Obama T-Shirt. She told me she wanted an X-Large. Well, I order her an X-Large from www.barackobama.com. Her shirt came. She complains that the shirt is too big. She tells me to order her a medium. Then she says, “Give me that shirt I can take it to the senior citizen club and sell it.” I’m like, “How you gonna’ sell my shirt and keep my money?” Long story short, I kept the shirt. So now, a couple of weeks go by and she hits me with, “Oh, I don’t know when I’m gonna’ ever get my Obama shirt. I guess I'll be dead by the time I get to wear it.” Which, in Momma Language means, “Child where is my shirt?” So, now I’m kinda broke and I’m thinking, “I’ll go to the hood and get me a hustle shirt” 'cuz I don’t want to hear her complain about how I’m a bad daughter because she doesn’t have an Obama shirt. I never went to the hood, becuase I was kinda' busy. So, I ended up at Urban Outfitters and they were selling Obama shirts. Skillz was like, “Don’t buy the shirt here, the money won't go to his campaign.” I told Skillz I know, but I rather do this then have my mother mad at me. So, I get a medium thinking she will be happy. WRONG! I talked to her the next day and she says, “I need a large because there is not enough wiggle room in the shirt.” Then she said, “I don’t want one with his picture on it. I want a dark blue one like the one you gave Coot” (my father). The shirt I gave my father is the shirt I initially ordered for her. When I came home with the second Obama shirt I told my father the entire "Obama and my Momma" story and I asked him if he wanted a shirt too, so that’s how he ended up with first shirt I got. Anyway, now I have to get another shirt for my mother, which I know she is going to have some complaint about when she gets it, but that’s my momma. Wait, I almost forgot. My mother said to me, "If the shirts would just fit the way they are supposed to I wouldn't be having this problem."

Saturday, August 1, 2008, 4:54 PM

I know, I know, long time no type. One of the inmates from the halfway home I work at went to school and googled me. Why? Because one of the staff members told one of the inmates that I do poetry and was on Def Poetry and she should talk to me about being a poet. . All the LCADCs amd CADC's, Case Managers, Social Service Workers... SAY IT WITH ME, "WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?" So, I've been wondering if I should keep the Journal Page, get rid of the the Journal Page. You know, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. The only reason I'm blogging today is let eveyone know I'm doing my play again September 25, 2008-October 5, 2008 and the tickets can be purchase on line at WWW.THEATERMANIA.COM. Will any of the inmates come to show? Let me just say this, "If you are one of my clients who have been released from the program or live at the program and I SEE YOU.... I'm telling DOC! That's an escape charge and/or a parole VIOLATION! HOW YOU DOING?!?!

Sunday, April 20, 2008, 11:00 AM

I don't even know where to start. I've been meaning to update my journal since my first trip to Florida this month, but since I've been there twice already and working on a third trip, I'm a little behind. So, let me start by giving shout outs to all the folks I haven't seen in years, but saw again this month. Shout outs to Ingrid B. and Renea for bringing me to the Bohemia Room. Shout outs to Will Da Real One, my eyes are still tearing from what you said about me on the mic. Shout outs to Michelle, the future of B-Side Entertainment. Shout outs to the sister that gave me a GREAT review of my show in the Miami Riptide. Shout outs to Jahipster from B-More, Motown Pride from DC, Triple Black from Detroit, and Lizz Straight - we just did a show together on Thursday. Shout outs to Ngoma, Osajafu ( I know I'm spelling your name wrong) for coming to check me out in Brooklyn at Chris Slaughter's spot on Friday. Shout outs to Chris Slaughter for asking me to feature at his spot. Shout outs to Shyster from Philly. I decided to hit an open mic yesterday in Jersey, walked through the door and he is on stage doing his thing and I was like, "Shyster?" I was all ghetto in the middle of his set, but he gave me a hug and went into his next poem.

Saturday, March 6, 2008, 3:24 PM
So, I'm at Farmindale State University on Tuesday doing a show. I get ready to leave and I can't find my wallet. So I'm like, "Did I drop it backstage?" It's not backstage, it's not in my car, it's not in my backpack and all I can think is, "Oh S$%^." One of the Deans who came to the show called campus police and they informed her they had my wallet. I left the wallet in the bathroom when I was doing my make-up for the show. Thank goodness for me someone was nice enough to turn it in and do the right thing. The dollar bill that I had in my wallet was still there. My credit cards were still in my wallet but, after I retreived my wallet from campus police, I cancelled all of my credit cards before I drove home. One can never be too careful when it comes to matters like this. Anyway, let me tell you how I ended up in the GARBAGE BIN in the back of my job. The story begins Friday at 1:30 PM. I'm at work talking to my supervisior. She realizes four money envelopes that were on her desk are missing. She keeps saying, " I had them right here and then I walked to the closet ... " (which is in her office) ... and then the light bulb went off. She realizes she turned her back to one of the inmates for three seconds and that was all the time that inmate needed to STEAL MONEY OFF HER DESK. Now we shut the house down, start the room searches, find the money and one of the money envelopes dumped in a back storage closet. Ms. McNeil, the same Ms. McNeil from my play, looks out the window and says, "I getting in that garbage bin." The garbage bin is, like, seven feet high, big, green and it smells like s$%^. Why did she want to get into the garbage bin? I'm glad you asked. We are still looking for evidence. Long story short, I get the ladder, Ms. McNeil meets me by the bin and she jumps on a chair and lifts the ladder over and into the garbage bin. She looks at it, she looks at me, she says, "I'm too old to get my leg over the bin." Now I'm climbing over the bin shaking my head. 'Cause I don't make enough money at this job for this BS, if you know what I mean. I climb over and down into the bin. Lucky for me there are only four garbage bags in the bin. I toss out the smallest bag first. I toss out another bag and, as I lift the bag over my head, nasty, stank liquid ooozes down my arm. Oh, did I mention it's pouring down rain outside? I reach for another bag and I hear Ms. McNeil scream, "Look at this!" So, I climb up the ladder. Ms. McNeil has opened and picked through the first garbage bag and found the missing money envelopes and a check. Wait, there is more. I try to climb out of the garbage bin, but the chair I used to put the milk crate on broke. So now I'm STUCK IN THE GARBAGE BIN! There is more to this story, but I don't feel like typing anymore. Let's just say, "I'M LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB."

Wednesday, February 20, 2008, 5:24 PM

Okay, so I get up this morning and my car will not start. I'm like, "This is a brand new car more. What could be wrong with it." I call my father to get him to come jump my car, because I've been in Virginia since Saturday. So, I'm thinking, "Did I leave a light on when I was rushing to leave for Virginia?" Long story short... I get the car towed to the dealership, becuase it's still under warranty... get a rental car, get stuck at the dealership, because I've been driving around with the wrong insurance card (must have thrown out the good one and kept the old one), had to call Skillz like five times, finally get home at 3pm, mind you I"ve been up since 8:30 AM trying to get my car towed and what not... ONLY TO GET A PHONE CALL, a few mintues ago, telling me the problem is, "MS. IT SEEMS THE PROBLEM IS YOU RAN OUT OF GAS." I'm telling you, I feel some kind of stupid.

Tuesday, January 30, 2008, 10:13 PM
So, I’m at work and Ms McNeil was like, “Ms. Lewis I threw away the salad dressing you had in the refrigerator in my office.” She has one of those dorm room refrigerators. I was like, “Was it spoiled?” She was like, “No.” So, now I’m like, “Did a mouse get it… did it waste?” She told me “I had to put one of the client’s stool sample in the refrigerator.” So, long story short. The same refrigerator that I have been storing my lunch in for months is also the same refrigerator we have to use to keep stool and urine samples for medical. Say it with me now, “UGGGH.” I thanked Ms. McNeil for not keeping my salad dressing next to a cup of “S$&*” and decided it might be in my best interest to get my own little refrigerator for my office. I wonder how much they cost, but I know one thing… I’m never putting anything in her refrigerator again.

Thursday, November 22, 2007, 3:30 PM
What a day! First of all, let's start off with, I'm on call for my job. I've been on call since last Friday (Don't even let me start about how I was there for four hours on Saturday because some of the inmates decided they wanted to drink in the building). Yesterday, my supervisor gave me the keys to her office and the safe and was like, "I'm on vacation. See you December 4th." Now this means I'm in charge of the entire program. I thought she was going to be on vacation for a few days, not almost two weeks. Anyway, I wake up this morning to the on call phone ringing. Someone called out because they had a family emergency. I really don't believe on Thanksgiving Day when you knew you had to work for over a week, that all of a sudden you have an emergency, you know? But I could be wrong. There was no one to cover the shift to watch the building. So, I had to get up and go to work on my day off. I stop by my mother's house to tell her I have to go to work, save me some food. She was like, "What food?" She didn't cook. She has been threatening not to cook since 1986. This year, she didn't cook. I'm like, "What?" No Mac and Cheese, no dressing that I love, no turkey? I know this day shouldn't be about the turkey, but no turkey? So, I said to my mother, "I'm taking these oranges!" I checked on my father and left with three oranges. Now, I'm like, "I'm gonna' eat three oranges for dinner. This sucks, but it could be worse." Anyway, I get to work and I end up staying there for like four hours until a relief person came in the building. The inmates keep asking me, "Why are you here?" I keep saying, "I'm not leaving until someone gives me some turkey." I think they were more concerned with the fact that they couldn't get away with stuff with me in the building.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007, 11:57 PM
He woke up today. Daddy woke up! Momma called me at work and told me. I left to go to see him at the hospital. He was talking and mad cause he wanted to leave the hospital. I was like, "Yep, that's my father." Now, I can really focus on my next show. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't practice, I was all jacked up.

Sunday, October 29, 2007, 3:10 PM
So, my CD release at Rob's spot, Mango's, was fantastic. Saw a couple of people I haven't seen in a long time and a few people that went to high school with me. Shout-out to all my classmates from Orange High School. My show at SUNY Upstate Medical was fun and I think I found a spot to do my play in Jersey. Things would be great if my father wasn't still in the hospital. He went in for bypass surgery on Friday and he is still in cardiac recovery. I'm really stressed about everything, but Daddy never worries about anything, so I'm trying not to worry. I'll just feel better when he wakes up.

Monday, October 7, 2007, 7:30 AM
Sometimes I think the staff at my job needs more help than the clients. For example, I'm on call this week. The last time I was on call, one of the inmates stabbed another inmate over BBQ sauce, but that's another story (see below). Anyway, I get a call from one of the weekend facility monitors on Saturday around 11 am-ish. She is on the phone telling me, "I'm going to take $3.00 out of petty cash to get a ham sandwich." Mental Note, petty cash is not supposed to be used for staff to purchase their lunch. It's supposed to be used for house emergencies like toilet paper, sanitary napkins, food for the residents/inmates. Anyway, Knucklehead is on the phone upset times ten. In the course of the conversation I figured out she came to work and put her lunch in the staff refrigerator. Now, because we don't have a weekend cook anymore, because he joined the Navy to go fight in the war, and my job seems to be too cheap to hire anyone, just like they won't fix the lights in the back of the building (never mind there is a serial rapist running loose in the area) or allow more than two staff members to monitor the building after 5pm (never mind the fact we house up to 50 inmates and there is a serial rapist running loose in the area) ... Oh, sorry got off topic. Anyway, the residents/inmates cook on the weekend. So, it is the responsibility of the staff on duty to unlock the staff refrigerator so that the inmates/residents can take out what is on the menu to be cooked, and then it is the responsibility of the staff on duty to lock the refrigerator. Well, because this particular staff member decided to just open the refrigerator and just leave it unlocked instead of doing her JOB, one of the inmates ate her lunch or used her lunch to make lunch for the rest of the inmates/residents. I was like, "Let me get this straight. You or someone one else on staff opened the staff refrigerator and left it open instead of locking it back up? One of the inmates ate your lunch and you feel it is okay to take $3.00 out of petty cash 'cause you didn't follow proper procedures. No, I will not give you permission to use petty cash to reimburse you for your lunch." She got mad and hung up on me. Anyway, motorcycle update: My nephew went to the DMV to tell them Daddy gave his motorcycle away with his plates, but they didn't believe him. So, he had to go to the police station to file a complaint against my father stating he gave the motorcycle away with the plates and take the complaint to the DMV. You gotta love my family. They make other people seem normal.

Sunday, September 23, 2007 2:04 PM
Just got off the phone with my sister Sandra. She calls me to tell me Daddy gave away Michael's motorcycle. Michael is her son, my nephew. The story begins two years or so ago, again at our parents' home. Michael is happy because someone gave him a motorcycle. Never mind the fact the motorcycle doesn't work. Never mind the fact he doesn't have a helmet. Never mind the fact he has three daughters and one of my closest friends died on a motorcycle. Michael gets the motorcycle, "fixes " it, gets a license and whatever he needs to ride it legally (or so he says). Michael leaves the motorcycle at my parents' home, because he doesn't have a garage at his home. Now comes the drama. Daddy keeps saying over the course of several months, "The motorcycle is in my way... it don't work... every time he drives off on it he has to push it back... ." Now, flash forward to two weeks ago. Daddy tells Sandra, "Tell Mike to come get this junk (the motorcycle)." Sandra says to daddy, "Ahhhh, give it away. I don't care what you do with it... . " Well, we had a tree in the backyard that needed to get cut down. Daddy made arrangements with someone to cut down the tree in exchange for the motorcycle. Now, Michael is looking for his motorcycle, but it's gone. Sandra doesn't know why Daddy gave the motorcycle away. She is on some, "I didn't think he was going to really give it away." I'm like, "You are the oldest, you know how Daddy is. It's all your fault."

 

Sunday, September 9, 2007, 11:46 PM

I just got finished eating oatmeal and a breakfast turkey sausage for dinner, because I just got home. Around 4:45 pm, I was at the Laundromat with Kasim and thinking to myself, "Boy, this has been one of the easiest on call weekends I've had in a long... ." I didn't get a chance to complete the thought because my cell phone rings. It's my job. I don't answer on purpose because I'm trying to re-train staff to call the on-call phone in stead of my cell phone (long story). Anyway, I pull out the on-call phone and wait patiently for a few minutes for it to ring. It doesn't, so I'm thinking, "It can't be too much of an emergency." I check the message left by my job on my phone. "MS. LEWIS, COME TO 'NAME OF MY JOB GOES HERE' RIGHT AWAY!! THEY ARE FIGHTING!!" In the background, I hear all types of screaming and noise. I jump up tell Kasim, "I gotta go." I'm walking out of the Laundromat yelling to him, "Two of the inmates are fighting. I gotta go to work." See, when you are the on call, you are the person they call when something goes wrong in the building. Now I'm in my car, my phone is going off, the on-call phone is going off, I'm trying to get out the parking lot and get on the highway. I call Ms. McNeil (same Ms. McNeil from my play Call Me Crazy), she doesn't answer the phone. I call the new Program Supervisor and another counselor who lives a few blocks from the program and tell them to meet me there, it's an emergency. I call my job to tell them I'm about 15 minutes away. Now I hear on the phone, "SHE GOT A KNIFE AND SHE STABBED MS. JANE DOE! WE CALLED 911!" Now I'm like, "This is not good" and I all I can think about now is, "I have on flip flops. Why did I take my sneakers out of the car yesterday? I NEED MY SNEAKERS! I don't know what I'm walking into and I need my SNEAKERS!" I get about four blocks from my job, but get stuck in the middle of some Dominican Parade and eight men on horseback. I turn down a one way street, realize I am going the wrong way, U-turn and get to my job. The RIOT POLICE are in front of the building and one of them is holding a riffle on the inmate that stabbed Jane Doe. Now, get this, the street is jam-packed with people from the parade! I identify myself to the RIOT POLICE, walk in the front door as the other counselor I called is walking out to check on the inmate that was outside with the RIOT POLICE in front of the building. Now, get this, my license plate says, "POET." Why is one of the RIOT POLICE asking me about my license plate and what type of poetry I do? I'm like, "Ummm, can we talk about this later?" Long story short, I walk past one inmate bleeding because she was stabbed in all of the chaos trying to stop the inmate who had the knife (which turned out to be two BBQ forks) and one staff member that was trying to break up the fight but got punched in the face. The inmate who started the fight was in the main office hiding under the desk. I tell you, it was just crazy. But this is the craziest part. THEY WERE FIGHTING OVER BBQ SAUCE!!!!!! Wait there is more. We called the main prison to tell them to come get the two inmates that were fighting. The C.O. on the phone was like, "It will be a while. The prison gangs are attacking the staff and we have to take care of this situation first..."

Saturday, August 18, 2007, 8:40 AM
HOW TO GET RID OF BED BUGS. I thought bed bugs were a myth. You know, "Sleep tight don't let the bed bugs bite..." Wrong! They are real. I wouldn't have know that if it wasn't for my job. Waaaaaay back in February one of the clients complained that she found a bug filled with blood in her room. She cleaned her room and didn't complain about finding any more bugs. Then we moved another client into her room. The first night the new client slept in her room she woke up covered from head to toe in round, raised, bumps. We sent her to medical the same day and was told by the prison doctor she had BED BUG BITES. The supervisor at that time under direction from her supervisor, moved the clients into another room, washed all their clothes, used some type of a tick and flea bomb to spray the room (which I later learned was the worst thing staff could have done from a bed bug journal), and closed the room off to the rest of the house, you know like quarantine. Anyway, the bugs spread through out the A-side. They spread because the inmates share common areas (the lounge, the rec, the company vans). The spread because the head of the agency was SLOW TO APPROVE MONEY TO HAVE THE BUILDING EXTERMINATE PROPERLY. As the begs went looking for food on the A-side they managed to infest the entire A-side. My office is on the A-side. I nevered worried about bringing the bugs home, because I wasn't a food source for them. These bugs come out at night (unless they are really hungry) and they sense CO2 (carbon dioxide) from a food source and travel towards that source. I immediately stop going inside of the client's rooms, stopped sitting in any type of cushion chairs, started sleeping with the lights on, checked my home for signs of bed bugs every day, and brought a change of clothes to work (I would take off what I wore to work but it in a plastic bag, put on new clothes (that I kept in my car) to go home it, and wash the clothes in HOT WATER AND BLEACH THAT I WORE TO WORK). My office mate moved out of our office to an empty office in the basement. She was and still is AFRAID OF THE BUGS. I wouldn't move my office. How could I keep the client's on the A-side calm if I showed them I was afraid to keep my office on that side of the building? Months went by, the residents begged staff for help, I printed out articles to give to my supervisor, but it was always the same the person in charge of the money was on some BS. With my own money I went and brought some bed bug spray I found at PathMark to try and help the problem a little, but I knew the spray would only help for a day or two. After about three months we got the okay to exterminate the A-side of the building. The exterminator company owner came in to give us an estimate. He talked all this stuff about how he does all the halfway homes, and doc buildings, blah, blah, blah, and he gave us a six month guarantee if anyone got bitten again he would come in and do it for free. Now, came EXTERMINATION DAY. The case managers and myself transported residents from the A-side back and forth to the laundry all day. We washed every piece of washable item, while the exterminator came to get rid of the problem. The next day the client's woke up with new bites. The exterminator came again, a week passes and the client's started waking up with new bites. Now, it's worse, because someone moved a mattress from the A-side to the B-side of the building and now residents on the second floor are complaining of bites. Then the Board of Health came to the building. I just happen to be there when they came and I was the only staff in the building when they came. I was like, "Come on in!!!!" Long story short the Board of Health gave us a list of things to do to help get rid of the bed bugs. One of which was put the mattresses in plastic moving bags from U-Hall, because they live in mattresses (wrong they live in wood, they live in the cracks of the walls, they live in news papers, they live in any space they can hide during the day after they feed on you). Anyway, the exterminator came again, but we didn't get the okay to purchase the mattress covers. Why? Ummm, mismanagement, a lack of concern from administration, I don't know. So, once again I go in my pocket and purchase sheets of plastic wrap and duct tape from Home Depot. We as in me and the inmates, wrapped and duct taped the heck out of those mattresses. However, even thought the exterminator had just been to the building we were founding live bugs, and bed bug eggs on the wooden frames of the bed post. So, we duct tape the beds. Some of the client's didn't want to duct tape their entire beds, but the ones that did got less bites or no bites afterwards. Oh, mind you my program didn't get the okay to exterminate the B-side just the A-side. Do you know how heart breaking it is to see a person covered in bug bites from head to toe as they ask you, "What about us we are still getting bit? Long story short the new head of DOC programs for the company I work for brought a Vapor Blitz III steam machine to the program. The women inmates were told to take their beds apart, bring them outside, and steam the wood twice. I DON'T WANT TO GO INTO HOW THAT DIDN'T WORK OUT... but we really didn't get man power we needed until an article came out in a newspaper about the problem we were having at the program. Then we got three inmates from our brother program came, all of a sudden we had two steam machines instead of one. These guys came in and went from floor to floor (four floors) took apart beds, brought them downstairs, steamed all the wood in the building, put the beds back together. Some of the rooms were so infested with begs the floors were completely covered in them (they didn't find any in my office). While the inmates from our brother program was doing this, I was running the inmates back and forth to the laundry to wash their clothes. There is so much I could say, but let me say this, "Bed bugs are an epidemic in the USA now. From the rich to the poor. DDH which was used to kill them back in the day has been outlawed, because it was killing of wild life. They only way to get rid of bed bugs is to tackle them at first site. A combination of steam cleaning (the bugs die because of the heat from the steam and the steam gets into cracks of the wood), protective covering for the mattresses, and routine washing of bedding and clothes is what worked for my program. The exterminator that came to our building tried, but he didn't spray all the wood, and the chemicals used were not strong enough to kill all the bugs. I hope this LONG BLOG HELPS SOMEONE" Oh, one more thing. When we pulled the duct tape off the beds we put duct tape on, bed bugs were stuck on the duct tape. So, they got stuck trying to get out of the cracks we covered with the duct tape. It was kinda' nasty to see, but I don't want to go into details. In thirty days we have to repeat the steaming of the wood, but with bed bugs you have to keep up a routine or less you will loose the war. We still have to battle the bed bugs and when we can go 15 months (Lord, I don't want to be working there for that long) then we can say WE WON THE WAR.

 

 

Wednesday, August 8, 2007. 4:20 AM
My sleep is all off since I got back from the National Black Theater Festival (NBTF) . I'm walking around in a fog. For those of you who never been to the NBTF let me give you some history... It's a biannual event held in Winston Salem, North Carolina. I never heard of it until 2003 when Weusi Baraka, no relations to Amiri Baraka, asked me co-host their Midnight Poetry Readings with Malcolm-Jamal Warner. Well, this year was my third year at the festival. Kasim and Butta' went with me this year. I addition to hosting this year, I was supposed to be my play, "Call Me Crazy, Diary of A Mad Social Worker," at the Urban League for a youth series. Long story short, I get a phone call, blah, blah, blah, I can't do my play their, because of some type of funding issues. Okay, this is after Butta' has made arrangements to take off from his job, not to mention the money I spent for promotional material. Now, let me show you the power of a "FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION MENTALITY." I made some phone calls, not to the people in charge of the festival, but to people I've met who where from Winston Salem. I told them I need a space to do my play. Tim one of the drivers who volunteers at the festivals told me about Greg, the owner of club 411. The 411 club is right next to the main hotel and it has a raised stage. I called TC, all around cool guy, he goes to the 411 club and scouts the location. He met the owner, told him what we wanted to do and dude hooked us up with the space for FREE. Well, I'm thinking he gave us the space for FREE, let's do the show for FREE. Let's give back to everyone that has supported me at Winston Salem, NC... Not to mention all of the people who might want to see a play at the festival, but can't afford the price of admission. General ticket prices range from $250 dollars to $37.00. So, now I have the space, but I don't know what time to do the show. I know I don't want it to conflict with any main stage shows, because this production is not part of the theater festival and I want as many people to attend as possible. So, I called Rev Lee. He suggested I do the show on Thursday at 6pm. Tim also agrees, because people (well theater people who might be able to help me) start to leave on Thursday. Well, I get down to the NBTF along with Kasim and Butta' and we are on the GRIND. Long story short, my show was standing room only and I got THREE OFFERS TO DO IT AGAIN. So, to everyone and anyone who might be reading this, "When life gives you lemons make lemonade. FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION."

Sunday, August 20, 2006, 9:12 AM
11 THINGS MOST PEOPLE DON'T KNOW ABOUT HELENA D. LEWIS

1) My favorite color is orange

2) I graduated from Orange High School in Orange, NJ

3) I was Vice-President of the Fishing Club, Varsity Softball Player (second base), Co-Caption of the Colorguard (We got down with six feet long poles with giant flags at the end)

4) I missed my high school reunion this weekend, because I've sick for like five days :(

5) I'm left handed (Hey, now that I think about it most of the poets I know are left handed.

6) I'm near-sighted in one eye and far-sighted in the other (Yes, I can see with out my glasses).

7) I am the lead make-up artist and female runway trainer for the Essex County Fashion Entertainment Board at Essex County College (Yes, I can walk a runway).

8) My father is from Georgia and my mother is from Homestead Florida (notice the southern twang in my voice from time to time)

9) I have a degree in BIOLOGY from Rutgers University (I love anything to do with genetics can't get enough of it).

10) I ran a drop in center for prostitutes for six years in Newark, New Jersey (I know it has nothing to do with biology, long story).

11) I can't stay off of myspace. Click here and check out my myspace Page
Friday, August 18, 2006, 8:28 AM
You know how they say, "Never leave the house without clean underwear?" Well, never leave the house without a bra on either, especially if you are a female. I woke up and the plan was simple: drive my car from Kasim's house to my house, get ready to go to the doctor and go to work (I have a cough that I can't shake). But, my car wouldn't start. Kasim, Kayo and Den-Den have all told me within the past week to get AAA, but I didn't. I called Kasim at work, he called a tow truck for me, because #TOW is a joke. They wanted $200.00 to tow my car to my mechanic. Anyway, after two hours of being stranded, here comes the tow truck with dude who was willing to tow my car for $130.00. He hooks up my car, I jump in the front seat and what a bumpy ride. Hence, I will never leave my house without a bra on again. Rob Hylton came and picked me up from my mechanic and dropped me off at my house and went back to bed immediately. Now, I'm waiting for Puffy to come and get me to pick up my car and then I'm going to drive myself to the doctor. I have too many shows coming up to be laid up in my bed SICK. It might just be my bronchitis, but I had to transport one of the inmates to the doctor the other day. Homegirl was diagnosed with oral thrush, an upper respiratory tract infection and she has a fungal infection growing on 75% of her face. If you know me, you know I'm a little hypochondriac, but, can you blame me?
Saturday, August 12, 2006, 9:29 AM
Okay, seems like it is taking a little longer for me to get the new site up. So, I decided to update this one. Where should I start? Should I talk about my trip to Jamaica and how my friend got attacked by crabs on the beach? Should I talk about how I ended up on stage at a Reggie Concert with Angie Stone, Darrin Henson, Red Rat? Should I talk about how my boy Rob Hylton got on the mic last night at Mango's after this poet jacked the mic at the end and was like, "Don't you EVER do that again?" Should I tell how I got glued into my office at work? Should I tell you about my photo shoot with baron. and the new pictures I can't wait to post? Should I tell you that "baron." is not a typo this is how he spells his name? Should I tell you about my dog having pink eye? Yes, he has pink eye! I don't know. All I know is I really miss typing on my journal page and that I've been working hard getting ready for my four-day run at the Nuyorican in October.

Saturday, July 14, 2006, 11:59 PM
I know it's been a long time, but the good news is I JUST CAME FROM A MEETING ABOUT MY WEBSITE AND WILL BE REDONE WITHIN THE NEXT TWO WEEKS. I'm talking new pictures, sound, video, a link to my myspace page and the list goes on, and on, and on... Now the other good news is my new play, "Call Me Crazy," won Best Short at the DownTown Urban Theater Festival. I will be doing a two week run in October at the Nuyorican and I have offers for runs at a few other places. Now the bad news is... this might be my last journal entry on my geocities site. I will send out an official e-mail when the new site is up and 100% on www.hdlpoet.com.

Saturday, June 17, 2006, 2:26 PM
Well, to make a long story short... Everything worked out fine. The play was sold out, I got a standing O, and three offers to do it again. Thank you, thank you, to everyone who came, helped with the production, sent out e-mail blasts telling your friends about the show, posted the info on myspace. Special, Special, Special shout outs to: Steve "Puffy" Donaldson, Blue Lion, Jessie for hooking a sister up with a sound cue CD at the last minute, MY DIRECTOR, BUTTAFLYSOUL, Skillz for leaving work early to help me, everyone who helped me take my hair out those braids on the curb in front of the theater, Darrin Henson for coming straight over after his shoot was over, Kasim for telling everyone about the show and putting up with me for tast couple of weeks, Arcos Entertainment, Rob Hylton, Rev Lee and Baron for searching for sound cues and music for me, Big Chris for looking me out with that SuperFly song, everyone who sent me well wishes, and to the dude who asked me, "Why are you being lazy with your art?" Thank you for pushing me.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006, 12:23 AM
I know I have not posted in a long time. I've been working like crazy trying to get my new show ready for the DownTown Urban Theater Festival. I'm talking getting off from work, driving to the city for rehearsal, getting home at 2am, and getting up at 7am to start my day over. It's just a one-day run and I already have an offer to do the show again. I was like, "Wow, you want to book it and you haven't even seen it." My new one-person show, "Call Me Crazy," is completely different from my last show. I do over 15 characters and ButtaFlySoul is my director. We work well together. I just came from Jessie's house in Brooklyn making my sound cue CD. Rev Lee (who lives in Georgia), Baron, Butta' and Jessie pulled together to get my sound cues together. I was supposed to do them on Saturday, but the studio where I was supposed to go called talking about, "We are having equipment trouble." I was like, "What!" I got an immediate headache. I couldn't breath, I kept thinking the show is less then a week and my sound cues are %$#@ up. Then on top of all of that the person who was supposed to do a voice over backed out at the last minute. Thank God for me Puffy called Blue Lion and he drove to Brooklyn just to record two lines. Now that is love. I tell you I haven't worked this hard in a long time, but I think it was well worth the drama. So, if you are not doing anything this Thursday, June 15, 2006, please come to my new play. Where? I'm glad you asked. It will be at the Cherry Lane Theater at 38 Commerce Street Greenwich Village in New York City. For additional information and tickets go to DownTownUrban.net.
Monday, April 24, 2006, 10:12PM
I went to this jazz club in West Orange to see Malcolm-Jamal Warner perform with his band yesterday. A lot of people don't know this, but he plays the bass guitar. When he sent out the e-mail blast that he was going to be at Cecil's, I was like, "Yo, that's right around the corner from my house. I gotta' go see my boy." So I called him and let him know I was coming to the show with Kasim. Now, what I didn't expect him to do was pull me onstage to do a poem. That was so cool. There were a couple of people there I knew, but they didn't know I performed. They were all shocked. I thought it was cute. So, that will go down as one of the most memorable nights of my life. Oh, Jeff Fox from 98.7 Kiss FM was there. He sat in on a set and played with Malcolm's band. He is pretty good too, but the dude that was on the saxophone was just nasty. Made me want to play the sax. Oh, if you go to Cecil's, don't order the mozzarella sticks. Me and Kasim were like, "How can you mess up mozzarella sticks?"
Wednesday, April 19, 2006, 11:59 PM
Let's start with, my car broke down again getting off of the Route 19 exit ramp last week. To make matters worse, I had one of the prisoners in my car. I took her to get her college transcript sent from Union County College to Passaic County College so she could start classes there this summer (they can take college classes when they are locked up at the main prison). I called my job to let them know I had broken down, they came and got the prisoner and left my butt on the side of the highway. I know! Say it with me, "That's @#$%$ up!" I called my mechanic Carlos and had the Volkswagen towed to his repair shop, where I had to tell him all of my car drama, starting with AAMACO to the car being towed to his shop, which is where I should have driven it when it broke down coming from the NACA Conference. Carlos shouted and was like, "What is wrong with you Helena?" When I got my car back, Carlos told me the timing belt was in upside down and some other stuff. I was going to drop my car off at his shop anyway, because it still didn't sound right when my father's mechanic fixed it. Anyway, I promised the Volkswagen no more long poetry trips. So, for my trip to Wells College in Aurora, NY yesterday, I rented a car. Did you know you can deduct car rentals on your income taxes if you are a poet? Anyway, Kasim came with me for this 4 1/2 hour trip. I was glad he came with me. It's nice to have someone to talk to on the road. The view was gorgeous. I almost ran into a truck trying to look at the mountains, but that's another story. Well, we did good, until we couldn't find Longhorn Road. That led to us calling Stan, then calling campus security at Wells to try and guide us into the main campus. The show started at 7pm. We got there at 6:45pm. Talk about close. Wells College is right next to one of those Finger Lake and, until this semester, it was an all girl school. I had a ball, the students were so nice to us. I even met a student who is from East Orange. I told her to call me when she gets back to Jersey and I would take her to hang out with Jersey Poets. From what everyone was telling me on campus, she is an excellent poet herself.
Monday, April 10, 2006, 1:30 AM
I got a phone call from Andre Minkins asking me to come to Fisk University in Tennessee to participate in their 77th Annual Spring Arts Festival. I met him back in 2003 and again in 2005 when I co-hosted the Midnight Poetry Jams at the National Black Theater Festival in North Carolina. I'm glad he called me because this had to be the best trip I've ever taken to a college campus. Fisk University is a historically Black university. I learned so much the one day I spent on campus; from the history of the institution to the Jubilee Singers that toured the world to raise money to save the school in 1867. I was just dumbstruck by the history of the university, the architecture, the portraits and the items that they had on display throughout the campus. I did my workshop in Little Theater, located on campus, which was used during the Civil War as a hospital. Before the workshop I was chilling in the dressing room with Chuck, and Andre was like, "I want to show you something." He moved the chair I was sitting on and lifted up a piece of the floorboard and said, "This was part of the underground railroad. When they would come to look for runaway slaves, someone would sound a bell and they would hide in these tunnels. " I was like, "Damn, I'm standing on top of my past." I bent down to get a better look at the tunnel and it was about 2 1/2 feet high and maybe three feet wide. Andre said, "When most people think of the underground railroad they think people were walking through tunnels, but, in reality, they were really crawling and hiding in small spaces like this." I told him, "Cover it up, it's making me cry.". Now, for this trip I flew from Newark Airport to Ohio, but I didn't know about the tornados that hit Tennessee until I was looking at the news waiting for my connecting flight to Nashville, Tennessee. I was walking past a TV and heard, " 39 dead, thousands homeless. Tornados hit Tennessee." I was like, "What?! That's where I'm going!" I called Andre, but he didn't call me back. So I was like, "My flight is supposed to leave on time, so maybe I'm okay." I took a chance and continued as planned with my fingers crossed. When my second plan flight landed, I had a message from Andrew saying they were okay and the Tornados touched down about ten minutes from them, but the show was still going on. When I got back to Jersey my mother was like, "What's wrong with you flying to Tennessee in the middle of all those tornados?" I was like, "Momma, I didn't know about the tornados until I got to Ohio. Do you think I really wanted to fly into a tornado?"
Tuesday, April 4, 2006, 11:00 AM
I'm soooooooo tired. I don't even know where to begin. My allergies have been bothering me so bad I'm having trouble sleeping and I have soooooo much on my plate lately I'm just struggling though each day. For the last two weeks, this has been my routine: I get up around 9 am, get to work late, leave work to go to a show, get home between 10pm and 1am, help my nephew Jamal with his homework for, like, two hours every night (he is being home-tutored since he broke his ankle), go to bed between 2am and 3am and get back up again at 9am. It cost me $1,400.00 to get my car out of the shop and it broke down Thursday, five days later, in the middle of the day before my show at Princeton University with HerStory. I pulled into an Enterprise Rent-A-Car with my busted car and was like, "I need a car now!" I got the rent-a-car, left my car there, and drove to AAMOCO on Bloomfield Ave in Bloomfield, New Jersey and was like, "I just got my car out and it's doing the same thing again! It won't go past 40 mph. The dude, Leon, was like, "Well, it was working when you left, right?" I had to get my father, call my job and call another mechanic because I REFUSE to let AAMOCO RIP ME OFF AGAIN. I picked up my father from home and he went with me to get my car (which I left at the rental place) and he drove it to his mechanic. AMOCO PUT OLD SPARK PLUGS IN MY CAR (even though they charged me over $200.00 for a tune-up kit). I have a four cylinder car and AAMOCO HAD ME RUNNING ON THREE CYLINDERS, THE CATALYTIC CONVERTER THEY PUT IN MY CAR WAS NOT NEW and the list goes on. My father's mechanic made me go home and get my receipt from AAMOCO and he was like, "they RIPPED YOU OFF. THERE IS NO REASON WHY YOUR CAR SHOULD HAVE COST $1,400.00 AND THEY DIDN'T EVEN FIX YOUR CAR RIGHT." He had to go over everything they did and my mother paid $180.00 for my father's mechanic to FIX WHAT AAMOCO JACKED UP. I also performed at the Nuyorican last Friday, just got home from performing at Monmouth University and I'm flying to Tennessee on Saturday. Oh, I know what I wanted to write about, what's up with, after I left the Nuyo last Friday, I had to drive Skillz' friend Jason to his car. Dude could not find a place to park. He ended up parking so far from the Nuyo he had to catch a cab and walk five blocks to get to the Nuyorican. Then, after the show, he didn't know where his car was and I had to drive around with him and Skillz looking for his car. He seemed like a nice guy, but after 15 minutes of circling blocks looking for his car, I wanted to push him out and make him walk, but he was with Skillz.
Monday, March 20, 2006 11:58 PM
Well, let's start off with the NACA Conference I did last Friday. I picked Stan up at his house around 6:30 am. We hit the road and we are on our way to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania. Stan has the directions (and yes, this is the same Stan who took the Lincoln Tunnel to get to the George Washington Bridge), so I had some concerns. I'm driving, I look at Stan and he is asleep. He was like, "I got you." But no, you can't have my back if you are asleep. Homeboy was like, "We are going to be on Route 87 or 81 for 107 miles. I'm going to sleep." Now the VW, which I purchased new but is now paid for and pushing 110,000 miles in poetry travel, is having crazy problems getting up the hills. I'm thinking, my car is now officially a hooptie and I need to accept it, but denial is a @#$%^$$$. Stan wakes up and he's like cracking on my car. So I was like, "Stan, we are going up a hill ," to which Stan replies, "But we are going straight now." Anyway, despite Mr. I-have-jokes-about-your-vehicle, we get to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania and we can't find Gettysburg College. Why? Because we drove down a street, if you wanna' call it a street, for like five minutes and all we saw was grass, grass, more grass and no people. So we started talking about how we could get killed and no one would know where to look for us, we could be in a haystack, locked in a barn, blah, blah, blah, I'm talking our imaginations were in overdrive. So we punked out and turned the car around to go back to the main road, only to be told we were on the right road and we had to go back. Anyway, Stan drove home and my car was really cutting up. I'm talking, it wouldn't go past 40 mph by the time I got home. I thought it was the transmission (like I really need a bill for $2,000). Turns out, it's the engine and the gas is not going to it properly and something with the exhaust. Now I'm mad, 'cause it seems like every time I get ahead, something happens to put me behind. Shout-outs to everyone with a hooptie.
Thursday, March 16, 2006, 11:34 AM
My little nephew Jamal fell and broke his ankle. I had to go to the Board of Education to find out what was up with the home tutor the school was supposed to send, but never came. I also had to go to his school today to get his homework. He fell down four steps two weeks ago, he had to have surgery on his ankle and they snapped it back into place and he is in a cast that goes to his thigh. He had such a hard time getting around his mother brought him over here to stay with us. I don't mind him staying, but did his dog have to come too? This poodle thinks he is a pit bull. If you get close to him, he barks at you. If you try to touch him, he tries to bite you. I tell you, there is nothing like family drama. Jamal calls himself being upset with me because I went to the Board of Education to find out about his tutor. But he is not going to sit upstairs and look at TV all day either. Now, I should be packing (I'm doing a NACA Conference tomorrow and I have to get up at 5am), but, like always, I'm finding all types of stuff to do except for what I'm supposed to be doing.
Thursday, February 23, 2006 12:19AM
Never a dull day in my life. I left work today and flagged down an ambulance to let them know, "THIS IS THE BUILDING." One of the clients had an asthma attack that lasted, like, three hours and counting. I don't know why she wasn't taken to the hospital sooner, but that's another story. Lord knows you can't play with asthma. Anyway, I flagged down the ambulance and usually I stick around to help out, but Annie Sez had a sale on jackets and I was on my way, because one of my co-workers had went the day before and got this hot pink embroidered corduroy coat that I had to have. So, I fly down the parkway to Annie Sez, found the jacket (which was on sale for $25.00), made my way the cash register and this guy that works there walks to the counter and says, "I don't feel well." Next thing I know, homeboy falls straight back, hits the ground hard as heck. The people that worked there froze, didn't know what to do. I had to tell them to call 911. Told them, "Don't move him," asked him if he was feeling hot or cold. He said, "Cold." Told them to put a blanket over him, asked him a few other questions and kept him calm until the ambulance came. I think I should have gotten an additional discount on my jacket. Anyway, shout-outs to my boy Al Letson. I drove to Baltimore with Kasim to see Al Letson's play, "Julius X." I was so proud of Al. The first time I really remember Al Letson was at the 2000 National Poetry Slam in Providence, RI. I was on the Nuyorican Slam Team and he had made it to the finals with us as an individual. After he performed, he came backstage to warn all of us about the mic being jacked up. Believe me when I say it's rare to find someone to look out for you at the Nationals that's not on your team. I had seen him slam at the Nuyorican before, but never spoke to him or I don't remember speaking to him. Anyway, he is definitely one of the nicest people that I have ever met through poetry. He doesn't do poetry like he used to, he started writing plays and has evolved that way. But I was so proud sitting in the audience saying to myself, "I know the playwright." He is also one of maybe five people that I talk to on the regular about the "business" and the only person I would drive three hours one way to see a play he wrote. Oh, "Julius X" was well worth the three hour drive and being pimped by the state of Delaware for passing through. I was in Delaware all of thirty minutes and paid like $10 in tolls to use their funky little bridges to get to Baltimore, Maryland.
Friday, February 17, 2006, 10:17 PM
So, I'm cutting up an old medical card from my old job and I could have sworn at the bottom it said, "Plantation Coverage." I was like, "Let me go get my glasses." Well, it didn't say "Plantation Coverage," but I'm thinking maybe that's my mind telling me to quit my job again. I struggle with this every year. Stay, leave, stay, leave, stay, leave. Now my job works around my performing schedule, but I know if I performed full-time I would be doing more things because I would really have to hustle twice as hard. When I first started thinking about leaving my job, I was always soooo close to having a steady income from performing, but there is no such thing as steady when it comes to performing.
Monday, February 6, 2006, 12:59 AM
I was just thinking, this was the first Superbowl Sunday in at least five years that I did not spend at Nile Goddess's house. I'm going to call her tomorrow and see how she and Jamal Saint John are doing. I'm not a big fan of football. I just watch for the commercials and, this is just my opinion, but none of the commercials moved me this year. Anyway, shout-outs to my sister Sandra. For Christmas I brought her a bag to hold her yarn, a thing to make knitted hats, and one yard of red, one yard of black, and one yard of green yarn. Although I was thinking about ME when I brought her the gift, I didn't think it would come back to bite me in the butt. She loved the gift, because she loves to knit. Last year, as in '05, she made me a queen size blanket and an orange scarf. So, when she opened her gift I said, "I need you to make me a red, black, and green scarf and I need it by February, because it's Black History Month." Well, I came home Friday and she left a giant blue plastic bag on my doorknob. Homegirl made me four scarfs . A red scarf, a black scarf, and a green scarf. She even made me a white scarf. I don't have the heart to tell her I just wanted one scarf. Because she is black, I just assumed she knew what I meant when I asked for a red, black and green scarf. I wore the green one this weekend and people kept asking me where did I get it from because they wanted one. My sister can knit, but she sure didn't know what I was talking about.
Friday, January 27, 2006 1:57 PM
I've been away for the past week. For some strange reason I keep thinking I haven't seen my mother in like two weeks and I've only seen my daddy like once since the New Year. So, I made up my mind that as soon as I got back to my part of the world I was going to see them. My father was like, "Where have you been?" My mother on the other hand didn't say too much, but looked at me as if I was bothering her. Anyway, since I was so close to Philly this week, I decided to check out some venues in the area. Whisper hooked me up with a list of venues in the area and I was on a mission to hit an open mic. I would have gotten to a few but, in a moment of weakness, I came out of my hotel room and was like, "Is that bacon?" The hotel had free food for breakfast, lunch and dinner and, for some strange reason, on Tuesday morning my veggie-bacon-eating-butt ate two pieces of bacon. I haven't had a piece of PORK bacon in I don't know when. Needless to say, by lunch time I was running back and forth to the bathroom. This lasted for two and a half days. I was so jacked up on Tuesday I just laid on the couch and thanked God for allowing me to breathe in and out. So, to make a long story short, I was only able to check out one spot. I went to Jus Words at Dowling Place and Whisper was nice enough to come after work and say, "Hi." If you haven't heard Whisper, you need to check her out. The venue was nice, the vibe was nice, the open mic was hot and when the host called my name to perform I got a rush of energy like I haven't had in a long time. I did my piece and went back to the back and someone walked up to me and was like, "Why you all incognito?" I was like, "I'm not incognito." He had seen my first DVD and he recognized me from HBO. He was like, "No disrespect, I didn't mean to bother you..." or something like that. So I told him, sometimes you just want to do you. I'm not featuring, no one knows me here, I just wanted to get on the open mic and check out the venue. I guess some people think I'm supposed to walk around and scream my accolades, but that's not me. Anyway, shout-outs to Cali Starks (who was visiting/featuring from Atlanta, GA) and the rest of the Philly poets I met while I was in town. I will definitely go back to Jus Words if I ever get the chance.
Saturday, January 21, 2006, 8:42 AM
Well, let me tell you what I did last night. I hosted the Brick City Slam at the Newark Museum in Newark, New Jersey. I was born in Newark, lived on a brick street in Newark, graduated from Rutgers Newark, worked in Newark, but it was my first time at the Newark Museum. That place is huge!!!!! I picked up a membership form and I plan on joining. Just think, if it wasn't for poetry I would have never went in the building. Marc Newel, from Arcos Entertainment, asked me last year, like in October, if I would host the slam for him. Hint, Hint, if you want me for a show you gotta' book me in advance. Anyway, Big Mike and Nordette Adams posted the information on their websites and slam groups, and I sent the info out on my group, and I'm sure the Newark Museum did some PR and to make a long story short we had over 300 people there last night. So many people I met told me they had never been to a slam before and wanted to know when I was going to do another one. I was like, "WOW!!!!!!" I perform out of state soooo much I just assumed the poetry scene was dead in the area. Well, you know what they say when you assume. Shout-outs to all of my poetry buddies who came out and participated in the slam. I'm talking, Chad Anderson, Trini The Professor, and Akil (who ended up being a judge). Oh, and extra, extra shout-outs to BIG MIKE who couldn't make it, but sent J. Skills, J. Black, Ashley, TC, and Joel (boy he has gotten big) to help support the event and slam. They are all members of his Youth Slam Team. Oh, and how could I forget the feature guest for the night, MIGUEL ALGARIN and AMIRI BARAKA. They did a thirty minute set together and, thanks to Kasim, Big Chris (who kept the score), the staff at the Newark Museum, the judges (who were picked from the audience) Marc and Tyrus, the show went by without a hitch. Well, except for the two ladies and the guy who cussed me out in the hallway because the slam list was closed, but that's another story.
Friday, January 13, 2006, 6:17 PM
And the good news is.... My new play, Call Me Crazy, has been chosen to be in the Downtown Urban Theater Festival. I didn't want to say anything, because I didn't want to jinks myself. I found out today I made the festival and I can't stop smiling. I think my year is off to a good start.
Saturday, December 31, 2005, 12:12 PM
I know I haven't typed in a long time, but I'm okay. I hope to have some good news to share for 2006. I don't want to spill the beans too soon. Just keep your fingers crossed for me. Shout outs to everyone who texted me and sent e-mails to make sure I was okay. I didn't reolize sooooooo many people read my journal page. HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!
Friday, December 9, 2005, 8:26 AM
Happy Birthday To Me, Happy Birthday To Me. Happy Birthday To Meeeeeeeeee, Happy Birthday To Meeeeeeee. Okay, now it's time for the Stevie Wonder version...
Tuesday, November 29, 2005, 12:45 AM
My best friend, Skillz, wrote and sent this e-mail out to everyone at her job for me. I didn't ask her, but she knew I was stressing trying to help my girls. It's nice to have friends who always have your back:

Hi all. My friend Helena, the social worker, is looking for larger sized winter coats for the women in her program. Many of you were very generous last year and earlier this year when she was seeking donations for the women in her step-down facility (these women were in prison and are now in Helena's program and facility for education, job training, supervision to prevent relapse, etc., prior to being completely released back into the public). So, she asked that I reach out to you all again because the women are desperately in need or winter coats as the weather gets increasingly colder. One woman, who wears a size 5XL, only had a sweatshirt to wear outside. So, Helena and another co-worker put their money together and purchased a $25 coat for her. Later, another woman told Helena that the woman went into a room and wept because said that no one had ever done anything nice like that for her in her life and she couldn't believe that they had done that. So, if any of you have larger coats ( they are in need of sixes XL and above) that you were just waiting to get rid of or that are just collecting dust in your closets, we would appreciate it greatly if you would donate them to Helena's program. If you don't have coats this size but know of anyone who does and is willing to donate, please feel free to forward this on to them. If you'd like some more info about the program, let me know and we'll get it to you (hint, hint Helena). Thanks again.
Sunday, November 27, 2005, 4:46 PM
I went to the mall today to get some new bras, but when I went into "Victoria's Secret" I had to leave. I felt like I was in one of those sex stores in the Village. Who told them to change the layout of the store? I couldn't find anything, I just didn't like it, and I don't want to talk to some seventeen-year-old-almost-woman about what bra is best for me. Needless to say, I didn't get a new bra. Anyway, shout-outs to the following: Red Rat from Jamaica, Bam "The Liquid Robot" and his crew, Jazzy, Michael from Alvin Ailey, Jo-Jo, Darrin Henson, and the entire cast of "Dreams Do Travel." I had a ball backstage and guess who is the sweetest person you ever wanted to meet? Vanessa Williams, from Showtime's "Soul Food." She talked to Butta' and me backstage like she had known us forever and gave us some really good advice. Backstage was a little crazy, but everyone helped each other out and we got through the shows. I took pictures with everyone backstage except Daniel "Don't take a picture of me" Beaty. He was being difficult, but I still love him. He had Butta' and me backstage cracking up. He is so straight forward, he's comical. Oh, in Daniel's defense, he did allow me to stand next to him on stage for a group picture. Oh, before I go, let me tell you how Butta' and I sneaked into the club scene at the end of the show. When I say, "Club Scene" I mean "CLUB SCENE." That scene was soooooo hot. People flipping, free styling, break dancing.... So me and Butta' went onstage and started mixing and mingling, dancing in the background with the extras and, after ten minutes, I was TIRED and thinking, "I need to take my butt back to the gym." We hung in there, but next time I'm going to stay backstage.
Thursday, November 24, 2005, 1:07 PM
Happy Thanksgiving!!!! Let's start with yesterday. I had to go to a rehearsal. After the rehearsal, I went to BBQ's with Butta' and Kasim and, if you are from the Tri- State area, you know it was cold as heck last night. Anyway, after we ate I was like, "Butta' you want me to drop you off in Harlem?" and he was like, " No." And then the wind started to blow and Butta' said, "You know what, I'll take that ride to Harlem. I can go to the porno store later." I was like, "Butta', you were going to diss us for porn?" I laughed so hard, my back started to hurt and I couldn't catch my breath. I told Butta' I was going to blow his spot up on my website and he was like, "I don't care." So Butta', this entry is for you.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005, 4:31 PM
Just got home. Now I have to rush to New York for a rehersal. Ever felt like you were soooooo close, but sooooo far at the same time?
Sunday, November 20, 2005, 1:02 PM
Man, I must have been crazy tired. I just woke up. I've been burning the midnight oil working on my second play, my second CD, and some other stuff. I did the NJPAC show last night. I was sitting back stage with Droopy, Flow and Charles from Serengeti Plains and my cell phone rings. It's Kasim telling me Big Chris can't get in because the show is sold out. I was like, "Talk to Charles, because I can't help you." So, I called Ms. McNeil from my job to tell her the show was sold out. She was like, "What? Oh, we're getting in!!!!" I found out later about a hundred people were turned away from the show, but guess what? Yep, you're right, Ms. McNeil and the two other people from my job got in to see the show. I don't know what they did and I didn't ask. I never did a show where there was sooooooo much food back stage for the performers... of course this made Big Mike very happy. Okay, I guess that's it for now, but before I go I gotta' tell you about "Dreams Do Travel." It's a Hip Hop Musical written and choreographed by Darrin Henson. I have never seen dancing like that in my life. People sliding across the floor, girls bending their legs behind their heads... I can go on and on, but I won't. Butta', Daniel Beaty, and myself will be doing some of our poems during the poetry segment of the show.
Saturday, November 12, 2005, 8:45 AM
I'm still laughing at Butterfly Soul's sad, sorry, attempt to keep score at the Nuyorican during the Wednesday Night Slam. The story begins... I call Butta' and he meets me at Go Sushi for dinner. Afterwards, we decide to go to the Nuyorican to support Mohogany Brown, because it was her first night taking over the hosting duties from Nathan P. who is now the host of the Friday night slams. Anyway, we get there and we are chilling by the bar and in come Rives (the poet that uses sign language while doing poetry sometimes). We are all chilling, talking about how good poetry has been to us and Mo Brown walks up to us and ask us to slam. We were like, "We didn't come here to slam." Next thing I know Rives get to preaching about how we need to help Mo Brown 'cause it's her first night. That's how he ended up being the goat, Butta' the score keeper, and me, I was the in-between poet. The first poets goes up. Homeboy gets a 5, another 5, and a 3.2. Butta' has a calculator, paper, and pen, but could not come up with the score. He claims he thought he did something wrong and was checking his math, because he'd never seen anyone get a 13.2 in a slam. Wait, there is more. Butta' was so bad, Rives had to tell him the scores which he added in his head as the night progressed. Butta' didn't get the hang of things until the night was almost over. I don't understand. On another note, shout-outs to Claudia Allick, Peuo, Daniel Beaty, Kool Breeze and Kayo. We were hanging at NJIT last night for the ACUI conference. We had to present for HerStory and Daniel ripped a 15 minute snippet of "Emergence-SEE."
Wednesday, November 9, 2005, 7:30 AM
I'm proud of myself. I've been sticking to my schedule working on my second play and my CD. I blocked out time in my schedule to work on both projects, because it wasn't working out before. Anyway, I have to type a few things. Let's start with, "CRACKHEADS GONE WILD." I'm walking down 125th Street in Harlem with two close friends, another female, and a little boy. Well, you know how they sell everything imaginable on 125th Street? Good!!! Why did my two poetry/singer/performer friends and the female I was with want to buy a DVD called, >CRACKHEADS GONE WILD?" I just couldn't get over that. Yesterday, I'm hanging again with one of them and he buys "CRACKHEADS GONE WILD" so they can all have a "CRACKHEADS GONE WILD" viewing gathering. So, I asked the young man selling the DVD about the production of the documentary, or whatever you want to call it, and dude says to me, "We don't advocate the smoking of any drugs and we do not show anyone smoking any drugs. We just show what they 're like after they smoke the drugs." Maybe it's because I'm a social worker, maybe it's because I ran a drop in center for prostitutes, maybe it's because I had a family member that was on drugs, maybe it's because I'm just tired of people becoming accustomed to laughing at people instead of trying to help people in need, but I will never purchase a DVD of that nature. I left my friends' names out on purpose, but they know who they are.
Tuesday, November 1, 2005, 12:30 AM
Oh my GOD!!!! I feel sick to my stomach. I'm on line doing some research and by accident I cyber stumbled over a blog talking about another poet I know. Dude was walking down the street and was attacked. All I can think of is, "I was just thinking about him." Now I'm thinking about all the people I've met since I've been performing... who I've managed to stay in contact with and who I lost contact with... not to mention all of the people I know who have died the past three years... It's just crazy. You work hard and someone comes out of no where and shoots you. You walking down the street minding your business and you get jumped... I have to travel by myself when I perform and I try to be careful, but stuff likes this just freaks me out. It's like humans have no humanity.
Saturday, October 29, 2005, 10:06 AM
I'm not even going to tell you how I was scheduled to leave work yesterday at 12:00 PM, but ended up working until 11:45 PM. The poem is coming. On another note the show I'm doing at the New Jersery Performing Arts Center, is on Saturday, November 19, 2005. Just go to my schedule page for more info and tickets. I have the flyer for it, but I don't know how to make it small enought to fit on my website. You know what? I need someone to help me rebuild my website. I've been saying that forever and a day, but now I'm ready to make it happen. So, if you know someone that is good at website design e-mail me.
Sunday, October 23, 2005, 10:43AM
Being the dedicated social worker I am... I went to work on Saturday from 2pm to 6pm. I took a client home to see her mother she hadn't seen her in two years. The client that I took is on my caseload and she talked her mother into letting a homeless, drug addict move into her home. When I found that out I was like, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!" The homeless, addict is also a client that came through the program and is not doing the things she needs to do to stay clean and sober. Anyway, we get to her mother's home and the first thing I notice is the left side of her mother face isn't quite right. I really believe her mother had a mild stroke in her sleep. However, she has not medical insurance and she is fifty-eight years old. I'm going to make arrangements on Monday for her to go to a local hospital to get charity care, but isn't that sad. In the U.S.A. people can't go to the doctor when they are sick, because they can't afford to see a doctor. Anyway, I spoke to the mother who is of course concern that her daughter is going to come out and go right back on drugs. She is also o worried about the girl that moved into her home. I was like did you give her keys? The mother said, "No." Thank goodness for that. I told that woman, “Don’t let your daughter talk you into doing something you don't want to do. This is your home!!!!!!” The daughter packed all of homeless, drug addicts belongings and put them on the enclosed porch… because she told the mother she was going to be moving… because she feels paying 100.00 for rent per week is too much and she was upset the mother wouldn't let her use the washer and dryer. Which of course made the mother upset. I just don't know what is wrong with people. My client thanked me for taking her to see her mother, but I told her, "I didn't do it for you I did it for your mother." There is so much more to this story… but thinking about everything is making me mad.
Sunday, October 9, 2005, 1:41 PM
I've been sooooo busy, my days are kinda jumbled together. In the past thirty days I've been on fourteen airplanes. I did a show at Western Carolina University on September 29, 2005 with Peuo, La Bruja, and Vanessa Hidary. Kayo called me two weeks before the event and asked me if I could step in for Claudia Alick and be their swing poet because she couldn't do the gig. So, now I'm the official "HerStory Swing Poet." Fancy words for "stand-in." Anyway, ten rehearsals later, a bunch of trips from Jersey to the York Theater and we were on a flight to North Carolina. The other poets were on a different flight so I met them for our connecting flight in Atlanta, GA, which is where the fun begins. My flight was delayed out of JFK because the airplane was too heavy. Airplane officials came in and escorted two standby passengers off of the plane. Some crazy non-flying dude was behind me like, "Who ever heard of an airplane being too heavy?" So, I was like, "If the plane is too heavy we could all DIE!" Anyway, I was worried I wasn't going to meet the girls in Atlanta, but I did. Before we all got on the connecting flight, Peuo was like, "Look at that cute little boy." I looked at the kid and, being an expert in deviant behavior, said, "That boy is bad. Look at him." This kid got on the airplane, took off all of his clothes, and was running up and down the lane. I tried to stick my foot out to trip him, like, two times. When we finally landed, I was in the airport bathroom with La Bruja when she realized she had taken the wrong luggage from curbside at the airplane. She goes flying out of the bathroom back to the runway. We had to go to baggage claim to get her luggage where that bad little boy was at it again. He jumped up on the baggage belt and tried to walk through the hole where the luggage comes out. La Bruja got her bag and we were off to the show. We received a Standing-O and then we all went to the WAFFLE HOUSE. Yes, I love the WAFFLE HOUSE. They didn't want to go, but it was the only thing open at the time so it worked in my favor. Hey, did you know there are mountains in southern North Carolina? The campus we performed at was surrounded by mountains. Can you say, "BEAUTIFUL?" Now, yesterday, I did the Mid-Atlantic Spoken Word Festival in South Jersey. I drove three hours in the pouring rain to get there. My car stalled out three times, but I told Linda I would perform and a promise is a promise. So many poets get bad reputations by not showing up for shows and then they act all surprised when people don't want to book them for stuff. I'm going to take my car to the shop on Monday. I have a few shows coming up and I don't want to be without transportation to the airport or to the venues. So, hopefully, it was just the rain. Oh, shout outs to Michael O'Hara from Philly. He massaged the hell out of my back. I tried to move all of my worldly possessions in a day by myself from upstairs to downstairs and I was in soooo much pain. He used to be a professional massage therapist and he also showed me some stretching exercises for my back. He also advised me never to try to move all my stuff in one day by myself:)
Monday, September 19, 2005, 6:57 PM
Let's start with my last trip to Florida with the family for my Aunt Lois' funeralAunt Lois and my grandma are in the same double plot. I didn't know my grandma was born in 1912. I also found out that my great, great, great grandma on my mother's side of the family was half Cherokee Indian. I always thought my mother's light complexion was from another source. Anyway, before I go any further, let me tell you this crazy story my cousin Brian told us while we were there. What's up with, when he was younger he decided he wanted to jump on the roof of the house. Yes, I said, "He tried to jump on the roof of his house from the ground." I'm talking twenty feet from the ground to the roof. He missed and broke his ankle or something. If you listen to him tell the story you can tell he was nowhere near making it to the roof, but he swears he almost made it. His mother, my Aunt Hermanlee, wanted to have him mentally evaluated. So, Cousin Brian, for the record, none of your siblings, your cousins from Jersey, or your Aunt and Uncle from Jersey (my mother and father ) believe you almost made it. Okay, moving on to my latest adventures as a traveling poet. I did a show at Salem College in North Carolina. I've done well over two hundred college shows, but Salem College knows how to treat a traveling artist. Shout-outs to Sarah Timko for picking me up, taking me to the hotel, taking me shopping, making sure I ate and getting me to the airport the next day. Oh, before I forget, "Hi Patrick." Patrick was one of the people that came to the show. I picked on him all night long. He's a good sport. Now, before I go, my job sent me to Newark, NJ to run a program for male prisoners. What's up with, the person in charge of the program before I got there allowed the prisoners to go to NJPAC on Thursday nights for the free jazz concerts. Now, being from Northern New Jersey, I have been to NJPAC on a Thursday night a few times and it is not the place where you want 20 mentally ill individuals roaming around without supervision. That's all I have to say. Oh, and get this, they can go to NJPAC and stand up from 5 pm to 10:30 pm but refuse to sit in a group for 45 minutes to discuss relapse prevention. I shut all that down. I even sent two prisoners back to the main prison on Thursday. I'm pretty sure those were two prostitutes that followed them into the building. Anyway, today was my last day there and I go back to the program in Paterson with the women tomorrow. From what I found out today, another girl got sent back to prison for having a cell phone in her happy area. What's up with these women putting cell phones in their vaginas? I hope they wrapped them in a plastic bag or something first. But, no matter how you look at it, it's nasty.
Monday, August 29, 2005, 2:57 PM
When it rains, it pours. I was driving my car on Saturday on the way to Sandra's house (my oldest sister). I hear this noise coming from the engine area that does not sound right. I went home, parked the car and decided not to drive it until I take it to my mechanic. Big Chris and Kasim came over and popped the trunk and noticed one of the belts was torn. To make a long story short, Big Chris was nice enough to drive me to the mall to get these shoes I had to have and today my plan was to drop the car off, walk 1/2 mile to the bus stop and catch two buses to go to work in Paterson, New Jersey. Well, that is not what happened. As soon as I got off of 280, on my way to the mechanic, my car over-heated and I was unable to steer it. My non-Triple A-having-self was stuck on the side of the road and it was 7:30 am. I called my job, because I was supposed to take some of the prisoners to a job fair. That's the only reason I was willing to walk 1/2 mile to a bus stop, and catch two buses (approximately two hours) to go to work. I know what you are saying, "Prisoners at a job fair?" But, if someone doesn't give them a chance to work a legal job, how can they ever change? Anyway, the tow guy doesn't come for like an hour. Meanwhile, I call Rob "To The Rescue" Hylton and he came, waited with me and dropped me home after I got the car to the shop. Oh, Skillz is okay. I spoke to her yesterday and she was home. Well, to make a long story short, I never made it to work and while I'm in the middle of all my personal drama, my job calls me and says, " Ms. Lewis, we know you are having problems, but the girls want to know who is going to take them to the job fair." I wanted to say, "Not me. I'm stuck in Newark and I'm trying to get a tow truck. Hello!!" But, I had already made arrangements with a co-worker to take the girls to the job fair, right after I called for a tow truck. I need a raise, an award, something!
Sunday, August 28, 2005, 5:08 PM
I tell you, if it's not one thing it's another. My aunt Lois passed away and I'm getting ready to go to Florida for the funeral. I was supposed to go on vacation, but I had to cancel the trip to go to the funeral. I didn't know her very well, but she told the best stories. My mother is doing okay. She told me the other day, "Everyone has gone and left me." She was talking about being the last of her siblings to still be alive. I also can't find Skillz. In between planning air travel for five people, renting a car, working out my days off from work, figuring out who was going to take care of the dogs while we were gone, I forgot Skillz went to New Orleans. From looking at the news, she is in the middle of that hurricane. I called her cell phone, but she didn't answer. I wonder if she has free roaming and long distance. Well, I'm just going to hope no new is good news.
Thursday, Augsut 25, 2005, 11:02 PM
I've been wanting to type for awhile now. Now, I have so much stuff to write about, I don't know where to start. So, let me start with how Uche', Skillz, Myra and I almost got KICKED out of Chester Gregory's CD Release Party at the CUTTING ROOM in NYC. We get to the CUTTING ROOM at 11:30 PM because we got stuck in a traffic jam on 280 for almost two hours because of an accident. To make a long story short, we were tired, needed to use the bathroom and hungry. We ordered like $40 in food, ate and went to the part of the venue where you can listen to the bands that are performing. We sit down and the waitress is like, "There is a $10 cover per person." So we told her we just spent $40 eating on the other side, and she is, like, "Well that's in the other room and in this room there is a $10 cover per person." Meanwhile, Chester Gregory is performing, security comes to escort us out, the waitress gives me a $40.00 bill for ONE SPRITE soda. IT GOT REALLY UGLY. I told Skillz we need to call "Shame On You," because their "policy" was not posted; not on the flyer, not on the table, not at the door. They could not show us anywhere in writing that this was their policy. I'm never going back there again. Now, before I forget, what's up with one of the prisoners got sent back for having a cell phone in her "happy area." I'm just going to assume it was wrapped in plastic. We knew she had a cell phone (can't have a cell phone if you are an inmate), but we couldn't find it... I guess when she got to the main prison they did a cavity search. Anyway, MAD SHOUT OUTS to Chester Gregory for hooking a sister up with a ticket to see "Hairspray" on Broadway. He plays Seaweed in the show. After the show, I was able to meet some of the cast members and we, as in Chester, Daniel Beatty, and another guy whose name I can't remember, went to eat. Oh, and for the record, Daniel Beatty is comical. Inside joke, "Is your mother fat?"
Friday, August 12, 2005, 8:08 PM
Wow, can I tell you about the Midnight Poetry Jams at the National Black Theater Festival. The first night we had 500 people, the second and third night 700 people, and the last night 1, 200 people.. One night, there was all types of drama going on before the show and security escorted me inside for my personal safety. Is that not funny or what? Me, Helena D. Lewis, who has roamed in and out of crack-houses, been caught in the middle of a unit fight at the Essex County Youth House, and followed by sex offenders, had to be escorted in for my personal safety. Every time I think about it I giggle but, there were like 300 people in the hallway. Anyway, Irma P Hall, Sherman Helmsley, Phyllis Yvonne Stickney, Dr. Glory Van Scott, Byrd from the Judge Judy Show, and Chester Gregory all came out and did poems. Sherman Helmsley told me backstage that he was nervous about doing his poem and I looked at him like, "What!?! Are you crazy!! You're George Jefferson!!" As soon as he stepped onstage the crowd went crazy. This year, when I get my pictures back, I'm going to put them on my website. Shout-outs to the Grizzlies. They took care of me along with Gloria from security, Tim, Cynthia, TC, Weusi, Rev Lee, Jerrand, Chris, Malcom-Jamal Warner. Oh, and shout-outs to all the poets that came through, Yolanda K. Wilkerson, Mark Joseph Bamuthi, Daniel Beatty, D-Noble, Nathan James, Quill, and the list goes on.
Friday, July 29, 2005, 7:45 AM
I did an internet radio show with some of the cast members from the TV series I'm in yesterday. Nordette Adams from www.powertalkfm.com hooked it up for us. Her website is www.mojo411.com. In fact, you can go to her website and see the trailer for the TV show. The best part about the interview was working with the other cast members. Some of them never did an interview before and it was so cute. Hopefully, this is the start of better things to come. I'm talking, quitting my 9 to 5. Oh, before I go, I just got done taking a playwriting class. What's with one of my classmates was in World War II when he was a teenager. He is, like, 80 years old and the teacher's great, great, great, great, times some more, grandfather was President Grant. I can't trace my family tree past my great grandparents. All I know for sure is we are descendents of slaves, and on my mother's side, when we were set free, we became sharecroppers and, no matter how hard my great grand parents worked, they still couldn't pay the plantation owner for borrowing on the crops so my great grandmother and my father on my mother's side puts the kids in a wagon and ran away in the middle of the night and settled in another city. I won't say the name of the city, but I know it, because we still have family there. I wish I knew more. Oh, and I also know that the man who married one of my aunties great, great, great times something grandmother was sold into slavery by her own mother in Africa and when she was brought to the United States she told her kids "If my mother had known it was going to be like this she would have never sold me." Okay, that's it for me, but I don't know how I went from TV show to my family history.
Friday, July 22, 2005, 12:19 AM
In 2003 I co-hosted the Midnight Poetry Jams at the National Black Theater Festival in North Carolina. I worked my butt off down there. I was there helping to set up at 11pm, hosting until 3am, meeting with the promoter every night to figure out how to make the next show better, up at 7am, doing radio interviews, stopping the show from being shut down because there were so many people trying to get in security thought there might be a riot. I remember handing the microphone to Malcolm-Jamal Warner (my co-host), jumping off the stage, running outside into the main lobby, jumping on a table and telling a crowd of over one hundred, "Please vacate the lobby, you're not going to get in and the last thing we want is for the poetry reading to be shut down." I busted my butt and when I got back to Jersey I slept for two days straight and had lost five pounds operating on no sleep for five days. I just got my ticket confirmation from the festival and I going back this year to co-host. However, I plan to co-host, go to the Waffle House as often as I can, check out a few plays, and not get caught up in security issues this year. I'll leave that for TC, Weusi, and Rev Lee.
Tuesday, July 12, 2005, 12:57 AM
The Show That Never Was... The story begins last Thursday, I drive to a spot in New York, because Stan sent out an e-mail stating I was featuring. How does one turn, "I'll come through" to "You're the feature," I don't know. I get there and it was like a Jersey reunion. Jamaal St. John, Nile Goddess, Flow, Krosswords, Myra and the atmosphere. The venue owners were like, "No one came because of the terrorist attack in London." That's not what I was thinking, but the crew knows what I'm talking about. We stood in the hallway and cracked jokes on each other for like two hours then we went outside and continued for like another hour. After everyone decided who was going in whose car, Krosswords, Myra, and I went on a mission to Tad's to get something to eat. I didn't realize how far it was until after we walked like five blocks and I had on heels. We get to Tad's, we eat and we talk for like two hours. Tad's closed and we're still inside talking, but no one said, "Y'all gotta' go." We didn't realize they had closed until we tried to get out of the building and discovered that we were locked inside the building. To make a long story short, we're walking back to my car and we walk right past it talking. So, we had to double back like three blocks, then we couldn't find the Lincoln Tunnel. Yeah, we knew where it was, but we kept following these sign for the Lincoln Tunnel that took us everywhere but the Lincoln Tunnel. Oh, before I go... to the poet who tried to sneak into the taping of Def Poetry Jam to get on-stage, got busted and got banned from the show for life, messed up your reputation and got labeled "CRAZY"....Why are you mad at me when I told you personally, "I can't work with you. Your name is mud," while others decided to say it behind your back. You know things are bad for a poet when people from five different states call me up and say, "Yo, do you know a poet named ..."
Saturday, July 2, 2005, 10:54 AM
Well, I guess one can say, "You got what you asked for Helena." I woke up Wednesday to my cell phone ringing. It's my job and it is 7:30 am. I just went to bed around 3 am (I was up writing). "Ms. So & So is having stomach pains. She has been in pain all night." I call the nurse consultant and she is not home. I call my supervisor and she informs me Ms. So & So is HIV positive and I have to call the prison to get permission to take her to the hospital. I say, "Okay." I called the program and said, "Dial 911 I'll figure it out when I get there." I'm flying out of my house doing 90 mph on the Parkway, I get to the facility, and all HELL has broke loose. The staff on duty was trying to keep the EMT people from taking the lady out of building, because I wasn't there. I tell the EMT people take her to the nearest hospital and I will meet you in the ER. Ms. So & So appendix was about to burst and she ended up in surgery. Now, what if I had followed the proper channels to get permission to transport a human being having a medical emergency before I gave the order to dial 911? I got reprimanded for not following the proper procedures, but I'll do it again.
Tuesday, June 28, 2005, 10:34 PM
I'm on call this week at my job. I received phone calls from the weekend/night staff asking me, "Can people work extra hours at their jobs? Can we use a dollar out of piety cash? Can blah, blah, blah something minor?" However, no one called me to tell me one of the prisoners escaped the program, ran down the street, got chased by a police officer and two Correctional Officers from the main prison. I don't know maybe it's just me, but it seems like someone should have called me to say, "Ms. Lewis we have a problem. One of the prisoners is being chased down the street by a police officer and two CO's."
Friday, June 3, 2005, 7:34 PM
I'm about to go hang out, but picture this... I'm at work, in a two piece pin-stripe suit, a very fashionable white top, six inch heels, and my brand new wire glasses. I'm walking down the steps, okay, I'm running down the steps like I usually do and there is a female inmate behind me. Somehow the orange key chain thing on my keys hooks on to my right heel, and the next thing I know I'm going head first down the steps (approximately 40 steps). It's a good thing Skillz and I were really into kickboxing and we took classes for like six months, because I would have been jacked up. Why? Oh, in kickboxing class we were taught how to fall down. When I recovered from my little tumble, I said to Ms. Doe (the inmate that was behind me), "Why didn't you try to help me?" So, she says to me, "Ms. Lewis I wanted to help you, but I didn't want anyone to think that I pushed you down the stairs" My response, "So, you were going to let me die." Now, I've decided it would be in my best interest to take my time and walk slowly down the stairs.
Sunday, May 27, 2005, 8:48 AM
Finally, after five months of chaos, torture, broken promises, unnecessary drama, and learning things the hard way, my last "More Than Words" show at the Luna Stage is over. Someone asked me if I would do it again and I was like, "No." Well, maybe not anytime soon. I can see why Dave Chappelle bounced to South Africa: the pressure to do a show once a month, writing new sketches, promoting, dealing with bureaucracy, the theater, and the list goes on. Now, I'm just looking forward to relaxing for the rest of the summer and taking my playwright and acting class. The funny thing is, everyone who came to any of the "More Than Words" show loved it and I think that if they new all the drama that went into doing any of the shows they would appreciate and love them even more. On another note, shout outs to Big Mike for making the Nuyorian 2005 National Slam Team.
Saturday, May 20, 2005, 11:00 PM
Yo, you wanna' read something that is messed up? Since you are still reading, I'm assuming the answer is yes. One of the residents at my old program had a heart attack last Saturday. Two arteries collapsed on him and they took him to the hospital. The registered nurse that works with all the programs for my agency went to check on him in the hospital on Monday. Because he is a prisoner, there were two Correctional officers guarding him and they had one of his legs shackled to the bed. The man was in IC a step from death and they had him shackled to the bed with two guards in the room watching him. Where was he going? That's the Department of Corrections for you. On another note, congratulations to my boy ECJ on his recent marriage.
Thursday, May 12, 2005, 9:35 PM
Well, let's start with, I drove to Rhode Island last Friday with Rob Hylton to do a show at a college. The school was doing a late night type variety show. They had four things going on at the same time and one of them was a "Poetry Slam." I use quotations because, since I've been doing college shows, most colleges actually believe a poetry reading is the same as a slam, Anyway, we get there at 10:05 PM. We go running in, because the show is supposed to start at 10:00 PM. We walk into the building and there are like two students riding a toilet bowl and there is no one in the room where the "poetry slam" is supposed to be. When I say "no one," I mean the atmosphere and the furniture are the only things in the room. Rob and I sit in the room and a guy comes and says, "Oh, y'all the poets? Y'all can't start whenever you feel like it." And then dude leaves us. I look at Rob, Rob looks at me and we walk out into the hallway and find a staff member who was able to tell us that the late night shows don't always go over well. Well, being groomed at Bogies where our motto was, "Whether there is one person or ten-thousand, everyone gets the same show," I jump onstage and start telling jokes and doing poems. Rob was like, "What's up?" and I was like my contract says 45 minutes and I'm going to do 45 minutes. Eventually a security guard comes in. So, I tell him to have a seat, I ask him a few questions and then I start performing just for him. Forty minutes later two more people come in the room, then Rob gets on stage and three more people come in the room. So, basically what I'm saying is we drove four hours to perform for six people and still got paid. Gotta love poetry. Afterwards, Rob wanted to drive back to Jersey. I was like you can drive back, but I'm worried about the owl that is going to be stuck to my windshield and the bushes that are going to get stuck in my back seat. He didn't get the joke. So I had to break it down like this, "It's my car, my keys and the school has two hotel suites waiting for us. I'm going to sleep and we are staying in Rhode Island and driving home in the morning. Driving while sleepy is the worst thing any performer can do. It's just not safe.
Friday, April 15, 2005 10:34 PM
I'm in Kansas, so it's 11:34 pm in Jersey. I was walking to my hotel room and saw a computer in the lobby. Actually, the computer called my name and made me sit down to check my e-mail. I did a show at the University of Kansas. So, I gotta' shout out a few people. LaQuesah, her son J (my new best friend), Jane for making sure I got a hat for my father, Magan, Travis (who cracked on my hand writing) and all the students who came to the show. This is my first time in Kansas and I can't stop singing, "Somewhere Over The Rainbow." The show went well. I knew it was going to go well when I got stopped at the Newark Airport and security searched my HAIR. Yes, I said, "They searched my hair." Let me paint you a picture. I re-twisted the first two rows of locks on my head, I left the clips in, and tied my hair down. I go through the metal detector and the next thing I know, security is coming my way with the hand wand. The zippers on my pants were going off (this never happened before) and the clips in my hair were going off (this nevered happened before either). I guess they got some new and improved metal detectors. The lady security guard patted me down and then put her hands in my hair and searchd my hair. Have you seen the picture on my journal page? I have a lot of hair. Oh well, at least they didn't call for the bomb sniffing dogs to smell me again. Oh, y'all don't know that story.
Friday, April 8, 2005 10:25 PM
I'm not doing too good. Well, not too good emotionally. I just got back from a wake. A friend of mine was murdered on Wednesday and I found out today. Julia Barney called my cell phone this morning around 11 am. She got my number from James who used to pack out sodas at Shop-Rite. Shoot, now that I think about it, we all grew up at Shop-Rite, Julia, David, Malika, Shantel, Terrel, Tammy, my friend who was murdered, and a whole bunch of other people I saw at the wake tonight. His name was Phillip Damian Johnson, but I called him Flip. Anyway, I was so upset I had to leave work. Thank goodness for me, Julia woke up with me on her mind and called James. who had my cell phone number. I would have missed the wake and the funeral tomorrow. I don't know the details, but a group of guys car-jacked and shot him. He was alive after the shooting, but died at UMDNJ. All I can think of since I found out is, what a waste. He was a good man, a good father, a good son to his mother, and a good friend. I hope they catch who killed him and I hope they catch them soon. So Flip, thanks for everything. Thanks for driving me home after work when we were working at Shop-Rite, thanks for keeping me laughing every time the Shop-Rite Crew would hang out, thanks for trying to drive me home in a blizzard, even though we got stuck in your red Honda CRX on 280 and ran out of gas, thanks for snatching me up from Rutgers with James Allrich and taking me to get my first beeper from the Beeper Factory back in 1991. I'm gonna' miss you.
Saturday, April 2, 2005, 9:02 PM
Last Wednesday, I had to do a show at Iona College. I had to pick up Roz G at 6 pm and meet Stan and Don Chula at 6:30 PM to drive up together. So, I left work at 5pm and went down the fire escape. Now, I've used this escape route numerous times before but last Wednesday, when I got to the bottom and turned the corner to walk to my car, I fell in a pot hole. My ankle was jacked up. I'm talking it was hurting for the rest of the night. Anyway, I was running behind schedule, I picked up Roz and called Stan and told him I was running late. Now this is where the story really gets good. Stan is in his truck with Don Chula and I'm in my car with Roz and he is like, "Follow me." So, to make a long story short, Roz is like, " Why is he taking the Holland Tunnel?" So, I said, "Maybe he has to pick up another poet or a comedian." Two minutes later Stan calls Roz on her cell phone and says something to her about did we have the directions. So, I pull up next to Stan and hand him my directions. So we ended up taking the Holland Tunnel from Jersey to go to the GW Bridge. I know, backwards. Anyway, I'm following Stan, next thing I know I can't find Stan and Roz and I are lost. We had to call Stan for Stan to read us the directions we gave him before we crossed the Holland Tunnel. After a few wrong turns and a couple of cell phone conversations that began with "Where are you?" we finally make it to Iona. Roz and I busted on Stan all night long. I'm talking, in his face, behind his back and all the way home. How you gonna' take the Holland Tunnel to go to the GW Bridge? Anyway shout outs to all the students I met after the show. I met lots, I'm talking Sam, Josh, Rebecca, Liz, Ruby, Ruth...
March 10, 2005, 10:38 PM
Okay where do I start? Picture this, Big Mike is on stage, I'm standing next to Krosswords eating pumpkin seeds and drinking a soda, we're at Rutgers University (the Newark campus... i.e. the University where I obtained my degree in biology), Big Mike is setting up his "Vote For Me in 2008" poem, he asks the crowd, which consisted of approximately 20 to 25 college students, "Who voted?" I start to clap, then I notice I'm the only one clapping, so I say, "What, was I the only one who voted?" The crowd is silent, I look at Krosswords, I look at Myra, I look at Krosswords (now that I think about it, Krosswords didn't clap either), I stop eating my pumpkin seeds. I'm in shock, I feel weak, I feel like getting a gun and shooting some people. Big Mike starts pointing people out. He wants to know "Why didn't you vote?" These were the responses, "Oh, I had to study and I didn't get a chance to vote." "We all know one vote doesn't really count." " He took New Jersey anyhow." I look at Krosswords, I look at Myra, I look at Krosswords and then I get really, really, MAD. I was like, "Oh my goodness, with thinking like that, next election I might be picking cotton and living on a plantation somewhere." I start to sing "Wade In The Water," Krosswords sings with me; he is mad (although I don't remember him clapping). After the show, we talk about how we felt and tried to process our disgust, but it wasn't working out. So, I tell Krosswords to go home and write a poem about it and we can do a group piece about it... I'm still MAD!
March 5, 2005, 1:30 AM
Well, never a dull moment in my life. Let's not get into how two prisoners escaped on Friday and one tried to jump out of a window. I'm seriously thinking about writing a book. Between the prostitutes and the prisoners, I might have a best seller. Anyway, I was thinking about a few things. You know, poetry stuff. I have to add Mahogany Brown to my list of poetry troupers. A few weeks ago I did a show with her at 12 Miles Theater. Homegirl shows up with her left foot in a cast and crutches. She broke her ankle but limped up to the stage and handled her business. I signed her cast.:) I also have to add Shadowkat and Akil to my list of poetry troupers, because they showed up in the middle of a very mild snow storm to do a show with me at Rutgers University last week. Anyway, I went to Port Africa yesterday. I featured with D the Schizophrenic. Port Africa kinda reminded me of Serengeti Plains, but bigger. They had a massage room, they were doing hair, they had like a billion and one items you could purchase. I was walking around the room and messed around and bumped into a statue that cost $250.00 and then I bumped into a drum that cost more than that so, I sat my broke butt down. I did walk up to the register to pay for a wood carving of some stick men. It cost $12.00 and I wanted to support the spot. The owner gave it to me for FREE. I was like, "Thanks!" I'm going to put it on my desk at work so, the next time the "people in charge" say something stupid, I have witnesses. Hey, you gotta' get support where you can. Oh, well let me go to bed, I'm tired. I did a show with Likwid, MAD, and Akil at the Luna Stage. They were fantastic and they were on time. The only problem, MAD had to take a different train so he got to Penn Station a little later then we had planned, but he called. To make a long story short, great show, great people, great audience, and Chris Davis made his acting debut at this show. He did a voice-over for us for the Anger Management scene.
March 3, 2005, 9:30 AM
I need a new job, or I need to become famous like yesterday, because working for the company I work for is not the move. I've never seen a place where the entire infrastructure functioned on chaos. Yesterday, I went to work to find out one of the prisoners set the first floor on fire. There's a hole in the wall, black smut everywhere, and they fired a lady who was with the company for eight years. Granted, someone had to get fired, but the bigger picture as far as I 'm concerned is, if you HIRE the help you KNOW we need instead of having the SAME person WORK sixteen doubles in a roll, maybe the entire incident would not have happened. However, when you're working with inmates and one of them decides to set the building on fire, which is what I think happened, can one really stop them for doing wrong? Thank GOD no one got hurt. The room right next to the fire was empty because I sent two people out for UPS interviews. If the room was occupied, the residents in the room would have had to jump out of the window to escape, because the fire started by the emergency exit floor around midnight. Now that I think about it, I don't think one of the ladies could have gotten out of the window if she wanted to, because she is well over 300 lbs, and the window is small like the back seat windows in my car. So, to make a long story short, the treatment team had an "emergency" meeting (in quotation marks because things have been jacked up for a long time) to discuss what happened. Now, this is when I decided I needed a new job. The treatment director says, "Well, maybe we can get a fireman to come in and do a fire and safety workshop." I was like, "Okay, but what are we going to do about the ladies who are suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, and have been freaking out because they lost family members due to fire, and what about Ms. Doe who lost her entire family in one fire (six kids, mother, father, all at one time)?" I'm going on-line to start working on my application for graduate school today. My plans right now are to keep going on auditions and go back to school in September, because I have to leave.
Thursday, February 3, 2005, 8:29 PM
What's really good? I learned that from Doughboy. Anyway, I spent all of last night, or should I say early this morning, at Mountainside Hospital in Montclair. But, before you get the 411 on that, let me tell you about Tuesday. Tuesday, I went to work at 7 am because I had to transport a prisoner to a municipal court appearance that was on my caseload. I get ready to drive the prisoner back to the halfway house and I'm like, "What's that noise?" The company van had a flat tire and I was basically up a creek without a paddle. I pulled over, I called the office on my cell phone and they ask me do I have AAA. I was like, "No, but I'm in Linden, NJ with a DOC inmate/resident and I don't know how to change a tire. Who is going to come get us and what is the company procedure?", Their response, "Do you have a cell phone we can call you back at and maybe you can walk to a gas station for help." Okay Einstein, you don't have to say anything to me. I'm on my own with an inmate. A few minutes later, Johnny Walker Red walks up to me and says, "Y'all need some help?" I most certainly do. Johnny Walker Red isn't his real name, but by the time dude walked up to me, I realized that he smelled like a combination of all the alcohol in the world. Before he asked me if I needed help, I had searched search the back of the van, only to learn the spare tire was under the van and I had no idea how to work the jack, but I was sitting on the back of the van with the door open about to give it the old college try. Dude changed the tire. He laid in the middle of the street in the mud and snow, and changed my tire. Dude had mud all down the back of his clothes. At first I was going to give him $20, but I ended up giving him $40 just because of the mud that was all over his coat and clothes. Now, back to me being at Mountainside Hospital, to which I wouldn't recommend anyone send their dog. That's all I have to say about Mountainside Hospital for now.
Monday, January 31, 2005, 4:00 PM
You wanna' talk about kool? Kool, is sitting on-stage next to Gordon from Sesame Street and Marilyn from The Munsters. The story begins Friday, January 28, 2005. I sneak down the fire escape of my job to make a 5 pm rehearsal. Kirk Mouser from the Luna Stage asked me to take part in a reading of Mayo Simon's new play, "Perfect Wedding." I say, " Yes" because I think it will give me the chance to get a mini-acting lesson for free. I'm at rehearsal, the cast is in a semi-circle and I can't for the love of God figure out where I know the person who is playing the father from. After the rehearsal, he walks up to me and says, "Helena I picked up one of your cards from the lobby and visited your web site. Who takes your pictures?" I proceed to tell him about baron. and how I just learned to put pictures on my web site. After he leaves, I say to Kirk Mouser, "His voice is so familiar, but I just can't place it, I know him from somewhere." That's when Kirk says, "Oh, that is Roscoe Orman. He plays Gordon on Sesame Street and the lady who plays your mother is Beverly Owen from the Munsters." I was like, "What!" Now, hold that thought. After rehearsal, I stick around the Luna Stage, because I have to perform for a Tsunami benefit that was hosted by Frankie Faison, who is really down to earth. If you don't know who he is, he's on the HBO series, The Wire, and he was the landlord in Coming To America. He is on the Board of Directors at the Luna Stage. Anyway, somehow I ended up on-stage pulling tickets for door prizes and when he introduced me to perform, I was like, "I'm multi-talented. Ticket puller/poet." Okay, back to the main story. The next day I had rehearsal from 1 pm to 6 pm and the reading started at 8 pm. After the reading, Frankie Faison complimented me on my poem and we talked for a little bit about writing and performing poetry. On Sunday I had another reading at 2 pm and, after the reading, I talked to Roscoe and Beverly about poetry and acting. I even got some advice from them. I asked Roscoe about where I should go to take some acting classes and he said he would like for me to take his class, but I can't, because I teach a class at ECC on Mondays for the Fashion Entertainment Board, and his classes are on Mondays. So, he is going to recommend an acting class for me to take and I'm going to take Mayo to a poetry reading in New York, and he is going to give me notes on my play. But, I tell you having the chance to work with not one, but three seasoned actors was priceless. And, to get notes on my play from Mayo Simon, WOW!!!!!!

HDL chillin' with Roscoe Orman
Saturday, January 22, 2005, 8:00 PM
It had to snow today. The day of my show at the Luna Stage. I'm supposed to be on stage right now with the rest of my poetry buddies. I think I jinxed the show, because last week I said to myself, "I bet it snows next Saturday." Wednesday, Big Mike calls my cell phone and says, "What you gonna' do about the snow on Saturday Helena D. Lewis." Like I had God's cell phone number and could place a call to stop the snow. I told Big Mike, "It's just a light snow covering, not a blizzard." I know I was in serious denial, but sometimes the weather people are incorrect. To make a long story short, I told all the poets we would make the call to cancel the show on Saturday at 12 noon. I'm a trooper, I've driven through a blizzard to perform, driven through a hurricane to perform, driven from Florida to Trenton, NJ to perform on Thanksgiving and the list goes on and on, but I know everyone is not like me. However, I gotta' shout-out a few people, because they were still down to do the show: Big Mike, who was like, "Even if it's just the two of us, I got your back."; Baron, who was supposed to be helping out and called me at 4:30 pm to tell me he can't make it in from New York; Sondjata, who called me around 1:30 pm to say, "Let me know what you want to do, I can pack the equipment and still make it."; Ngoma, who called me as soon as he heard about the blizzard to let me know he had my back; and Skillz, who disappeared on me the day before when I was supposed to make a videotape at her house, who left me a message saying, "Come get me, because you know how my car is in the snow." Man, if I had couple of millions dollars in my bank account I would hook them all up.
Saturday, January 8, 2005 9:00 AM
This entry is eight days overdue. Big Mike, his wife, Likwid, and Flow can kiss my butt. Let me paint you a picture. I told Jessica, Big Mike's niece, I would attend their New Year's Eve party. I didn't get there until after midnight, but I got there. I get a plate of food. Flow walks up to me and says, "Those chicken wings are nuclear." I'm thinking, "What is he talking about?" But that's not why he can kiss my butt. Well, I go into the TV room with the rest of the poets and bite into one of the chicken wings I got off the kitchen table. Next thing I know, I'm running to the kitchen, to the dinning room, to the kitchen, looking for water, bread, a fire hose. I kid you not.. it was like somene gave me a piece of molten lava and said, "Work it out." I found out later on that the chicken came from Cluck You Chicken and they had to sign a waiver to get it. Something about, "not responsible if it causes death" or something like that. But that is not why they can all kiss my butt. The nuclear chicken experience led me to talk about how my mother gave me so much drama about cooking the chicken for the poetry reading and this is why Flow, Big Mike, and Likwid can kiss my butt. Big Mike says to me, "Your chicken was good when I was drinking." The rest of those fools chimed in and started cracking on my chicken. Mental note, my moms was right. So now, it's 1:30 AM and I'm leaving, and this is why Big Mike's wife can kiss my butt. I'm saying my good-byes and she says, "Where were you? The party started at 7?" I said, "I was passing out flyers for the shows at the Luna Stage and I had some other stuff to do." Big Mike's wife says to me, Helena D. Lewis, "Bull@$%." I don't play when it comes to promoting for a show. So, beacuse she is also the person who brought the nuclear chicken wings, she can kiss my butt with the rest of them.
Tuesday, December 28, 2004, 11:30 PM
Drama, Drama, Drama (Sing Like Money, Money, Money) and this is my life. I go to work, I walk up to my office, one of my client's is on the couch in the living area crying with her head leaned back on the couch. Mental note to myself, "Self: It's 8:45 am. Do I really want to be bothered with this?" I decide to go in my office, drop my pocketbook and investigate. Before I can take off my coat, another resident knocks on my door, "Ms. Doe is having chest pains." Ms. Doe is the lady that is on the couch. I walk to the living area, I say, "Ms. Doe, are you having chest pains? Does your left arm hurt? Are your feet swollen? Are you having trouble breathing?" "Yes. Yes. No. A little." I go back to my office, I call downstairs to get back-up. "Tell the Treatment Director to come upstairs. Ms. Doe is having chest pains, call 911." Now, if you are me, and you, as in you reading this right now, were having chest pains, you would call 911 to go to hospital. But, because Ms. Doe is an inmate, the procedure for medical care is, call the Director of Correctional Services to get the okay to call 911. Actually, it is more like, call the Director of Correctional Services to get prermisoon to call the prison, to ask the prison if it is okay to call 911 and to take her to the hospital. I know crazy right!!!! Tha